Maggie was sitting at her computer staring at the letter in her email. She was surprised and intrigued. She wondered how things had progressed this far. She thought back to the day the ad was placed in the personals. She smiled to herself, remembering how her friend Angela and she, after a few drinks, decided it would be fun to put an ad online. Besides, Maggie was leaving Florida and going to Washington and she didn’t know anyone there. They had even put a picture with it after reading the response rate was better with a picture.
The ad netted over 150 responses in less than 48 hours. Maggie was overwhelmed, but felt it would be rude not to answer each one with at least a thank you for responding. She thought she better cancel the ad, because she was having trouble keeping up with the email. However, because they had been drinking when placing the ad, she had forgotten the password. There was no choice but to let the ad run through until it expired. It was the last letter/response sent to her that had her reeling at this moment.
The letter stated that she was being contacted because of her picture. He found her picture very attractive and went on to say. “Now, tired of all the other bull shit in life yet?? If you are a prude, or thin-skinned, do not read on!! And save us both the time and trouble!! Simple, you are fat. Not just over weight, but fat! Important thing is I don’t care, and never will care what you weigh! I will never tell you to lose weight.”
“You are tired of bull shit games and of being alone and you are willing to do ANYTHING to change that. You have kids, or you don’t. It doesn’t matter to me. You are looking for a tall, good-looking man. (not stuck on himself, just told that by women) that is self-employed, VERY DOMINANT, and dedicated to making you serve him for the rest of your life!! In every degrading way imaginable!!”
“No more boredom! And no one but me will ever insult you again!! NO ONE!! Regardless of how I treat you, no one else will be allowed to ever insult you again.”
“I am looking for a pig with a fat cunt, that does as she is told and lives for only one thing. To please me!! Her Master! Forever!!! Sound hard and heartless to you?? I am both!! But I know what a fat cunt needs and I give it to them! You will have no secrets from me, you will tell me everything I ask about you, with no shame, you will hold back nothing and refuse me nothing! And I do mean nothing!! I am honest, up front, and I don’t waste my time with bull shit. We will get to know each other well; I am in no rush. What I want, I want it to be right this time, and have it last forever. You will take what you are given and treated as I see fit.”
“For this you will have to give up certain rights. But you will have a life many only dream of. If this does not interest you, fine. I did not intend to insult you. If I had, I would talk to you the way I would if we were together!! So no bull shit letters telling me what an awful person I am. I just know what I want in life and that is what I will have. Simple. If you are not interested, do not respond. And if you are, do not be afraid to do so!!”
Nothing in the letter offended Maggie. In fact, for some enigmatic reason it intrigued her. What did he mean he “sensed” something about her? She wrote back to thank him and responded to some of the other aspects of the letter. She had no idea what he was alluding to, and had a distorted idea of BDSM, heavy on the SM part.
His reply indicated how amused he was at her ignorance, and he knew she had no clue what he was writing about, but he told her he enjoyed her. He explained to her what BDSM was. Bondage & Discipline/Dominance & Submission/Sadism & Masochism. He told her there were varying degrees and the relationship, the D/s (Dominant/submissive) relationship was far more honest and loving than a “vanilla” (a word used to describe a regular man/woman relationship). He told her he was a hard core Master that enjoyed delivering pain. He said he liked nothing better than a pain slut with deep veins who didn’t bruise.
They continued to write, he asking her about her life, wanting her to explain in detail and she did. He also wrote her in detail of the “interviews” he had with various women who applied to an ad he sent out.
Deep in her heart, Maggie yearned to be that person but also knew she would fail at some of his needs, and that was frightening to her. She felt He probably needed more than one woman, and thought and asked if he would consider her for a lap dog & said in jest, but she was not kidding deep down inside her. She needed him and his world. As crazy as it seemed, she was developing a deep bond and love for this man, a man she had never met.
As the relationship developed, he brought to the surface a craving that Maggie had felt all her life. Something had always been missing in her relationships, she had known that, but didn’t understand it. She always had known she needed to feel someone past their physical presence.
It wasn’t long before she set out to find more information. She searched websites, read stories, chatted with others about the subject of BDSM. She fought this for a few months; she confused submissiveness and slave. The different people she chatted with and emailed all had different beliefs in what a slave’s role was. Some were very loving and accepting of limits, others were cruel.
On her mental acceptance of what she was, Maggie felt the incredible relief of knowing now, Realizing that to her, freedom meant to give up control of her life, quit living the societal lie in all respects. Pleasing someone was her ultimate pleasure. Even when the Master would address her in terms that prior would have made her cringe (i.e. cunt, whore, slut, pig, etc); she now viewed them as a matter of address, nothing more or less. When his letters started, “Hi Cunt”, it gave her pleasure. When he called and she heard his voice, she became aroused and yet a calm would come over her as well. She couldn’t explain it, nor could she understand totally, she just accepted it, hoping someday to know the life he had instilled the craving for.
She set out to experience as much of the lifestyle as she could, sometimes finding people to help her & she was upfront with these people, answering their questions on her limits, etc. Her answer to limits was difficult; she had no one to test them, so she didn’t know her limits. All she knew was that she wanted to please. Some of the experience she felt she needed to
work with herself on, so she devised training methods on her own, with suggestions from friends, Master, etc.
Deep down, she knew all this was a prelude, a prelude of what one day she would live out.
